At my church, Evergreen, the sermon last weekend was about relationships. The preacher talked about honesty in friendship. It was a message I needed to hear. Because while I am brutally honest with myself, I am not always that honest with friends. I like to avoid confrontation.

Now as a coach, I am trained to ask questions, and that works well for me. Coaching allows for honesty in a gentle, supportive structure. But friendships are different. In friendships, at least in ideal friendships, there’s supposed to be give and take. The ability to occasionally be blunt and honest, without pulling punches.

I realized that I have some friendships in which I am afraid to be that honest. And my fear of confrontation is a barrier to intimacy. Fortunately, I can use my coaching training to ease into the intimacy of honesty.

What about you? Are you free to be honest with your friends? Are they free to be honest with you?

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